Thursday, June 30, 2011

Welcome To America... Hold the Pickles.

Welcome to America. A smorgasbord of opportunity awaits those who relocate to our fine, fat country. America is, after all, the land of the free and home of the Whopper. The numbers are out, rounded-off, so to speak, and the numbers are getting larger. One out of three Americans is obese. Not pudgy or ‘soft’ but obese. To try and put this in context, ponder this a moment: According to the CDC, in 2009 there were 33 states that were greater than or equal to 25% of the population classified as being obese and 9 of those 33 were equal to or greater than 30% of the population classified as being obese.

Talk about a growing population. Now it seems that immigrants to the land of milk and honey are swelling at the same rate as America’s home-grown populace. Apparently, being an American requires one to eat like an American which, in turn, causes one to eventually look like an American … fat and saggy.

America is now one of the world’s most overweight countries. This past week, I was at Disney World and marveled at the irony of the size of the people entering and exiting the ‘It’s a Small World’ attraction. I figure that it only a matter of time until the ‘Small World’ attraction features twirling, dancing and singing robotic obese children. There are those who go as far as to claim that parents of obese children are guilty of child abuse.

Our nation’s thundering herd is being blamed on everything from genetics to media to the workplace and technology. Technology? What does a serving of Google and a side of iPad taste like, anyway?

Truth be known, I suppose blame can be assigned to nearly anything when it comes to the blubbering-up of America, much like almost everything causes cancer. But when it comes down to the meat of the matter, the only cause of America’s population enlargement is a working jawbone. Each of us has one and most of us know how to use it. It’s just that many have no idea how to let the jaws rest.

Yes, welcome to America, brethren from afar. In order better serve you and enhance your experience, please pull around to the window and have your money ready. That’s how we roll in the U. S. of A.

The Kids Are Alright. Not.

Life’s a real bitch these days for the children of the world. Oh sorry, I shouldn’t use the word ‘bitch’, it is much too gender specific. Forgive me, Sweden.

In what is undoubtedly one of the most-lopsided acts of political correctness ever to flow from the nostrils of mankind, a preschool in Stockholm, Sweden has burst forth like an anatomically-correct hermaphrodite fetus from the womb of RuPaul.
The Egalia school enrolls children ages one through six. At least I think they’re children. There is no talk of gender division so all children are equal. No ‘him’ or ‘her’ and definitely no GI Joe and Barbie dolls, although the anatomically-incorrect design of those dolls would fit in nicely with the teaching of self-unawareness that the school is promoting.

This is an extreme in a world of divisiveness. Although the premise behind the school has merit the curriculum from the toys down to the books in the school are aimed at making all the children ‘friends’ with no distinctive differences. That, of course, will change when breasts start to perk and boys start scratching their balls at puberty. Perhaps that is the reason the school only runs to age six? A thought to ponder.

Alternatively, we have here in the good ol’ Land of Opportunity and Freedom a diametrically opposed viewpoint as is evidenced by the backwoods, banjo-pickin’, Tennessee Senate’s recent bill that is banning, nay, making it a misdemeanor crime, to teach, utter or discuss homosexuality in Tennessee’s schools before the students reach ninth grade. No self-respectin’ good ‘ol boy would want to be caught violating the state’s ‘Family Life’ program. Why, heck y’all, boys likin’ boys and girls likin’ girls don’t even happen ‘til college anyway, rigt? Right?

From an extreme of discounting a child’s self-awareness by stripping it from him, or her, or ‘hen’ as the Swedes at Egalia say, to the extreme of stripping away a child’s right to be self-aware by basically saying, “Shhhh, there ain’t no such thang as gays…. Least not til High School…” the points are clear and the lines are drawn and the kids are fucked. The politically correct are encroaching upon the freedoms of those who we’re going to rely upon to uphold the very freedoms they are being denied.

I’m moving to Mexico.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011


Pffft. Again, I say, .... pfft.

Just read the news about presidential candidates, the NBA finals and a volcano in New Zealand.


Not a single story has relevance to my life as I try to survive ... especially the presidential candidates...