Friday, January 28, 2011

A Care Tag In A Coat of Many Colors

Following is a little-known aside to the biblical story of Joseph and his coat of many colors. All names have been changed in order to avert lawsuits by the Hanes Corporation.

".... Alas," proclaimed Jacob, "I had no inkling that thy directive to create a coat of many colors would be such an arduous task ..."

"Thy directives were clear," saieth the Lord. "No mixing of colors, no flaws of any type. I made myself clear."

"But, Lord. ... there were no deviations in color. The reds were vibrant. The yellows were stunning. The blues were worthy of immersion. The combination of colors were arranged to complement each upon the other in order to proclaim your glory, no matter who might wear the garment. I spun the garment based upon your each and every directive. Are you not pleased with the result?"

.... Pause....

"Lord?"

... Pause ...

"Jacob, thous dost not understand thy God and His adhereance to standards of excellence."

And God reached down and with a forefinger and thumb grasped the multi-colored coat that Jacob had fashioned.

And God said unto Jacob ...

"Gaze upon this... the devil is in the details."

Squinting and amazed, Jacob gazed incredulously upon the tag affixed to the back collar of the garment.

How could this happen? The writing was nearly illedgible. The instructions for caring for such a valuable garment were exposed, upside-down.

"How dost thou explain this?," asketh the God of perfection? "Thy garment, worn by one chosen by Me, God, the Fashioner of Huamnkind, has a flaw. Yay, though I directed there be a small tag affixed to the coat which provides instructions for it's proper care .... Yay, though I require adherance to universal production standards ... "

"But Lord," inquired Jacob, "How have I failed you? This is my finest creation, meant to be worn by only the most worthy of my offspring. How have I failed you?"

And the Lord replied ... "Look upon Joesph as he wears the coat. The tag with wash and care directions is visible from behind as he walks among the heathen. And, although his brethren recognize his ignorance and wish him harm for his wearing a garment which is less than holy, Potiphar and Pharoah dismiss his ignorance as subtle humanity."

"Wait, wait ..." exclaimed Jacob, "My tag was upturned? How might I correct this oversight in order to produce garments worthy of your acceptance?"

God hesitated ...

"I shall call a meeting ... I shall consult my constituents in order to provide an answer. Because, an upturned tag with care instructions on a coat of many colors is a major flaw which will cost the kingdom millions."

And Jacob called for Joseph ..............................

Interpret this any way you will ... Think. Really, think ... find your tag.

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